The Order and My Near Arrest

If you simplify everything, there are 2 types of people in this world. The N types and the E types. N types comply with the processes, pay bills punctually, abide by the laws, efficient, non blaspheme, exploit corporate mazes, rapidly achieve capitalistic values, appear to be in control of things and respected by their wives. The E types are the eccentrics. They appear rustic, indisciplined, unpredictable, move their backsides only when it involves their passion, poorly paid and generally unappreciated. While the world hails the N types, this is a story of how unsuitable it has become for the E types.

I used to own a motor bike few years back. That was just a passion at that point in time. With the lack of any ‘wild hogs’ gang and with the bike getting older, I moved on to other things. So I planned to scrap the bike. Until here, it was fantastic, folks. But the tough part is to move my ass into executing it. Its boring things like this that I find as hard as shitting bricks. So in that mode, I dint even renew my parking coupons.

A flurry of pink letters followed, slapping me fines after fines. Finally I moved a little, paid the fines and scrapped the bike. Still, crap dint clear right. I missed another 16 bucks of fine somewhere and the Housing Development Board (HDB) sent me an arrest warrant. Now, my jaws drop to the floor and balls explode to the roofs amazing at my country’s governing machine. To recover a fine of 16 dollars, they double checked my address with Immigrations (which costed them 15 dollars), sent a registered post to my home (3 dollars), called the police to issue me an arrest warrant (50 dollars) and booked a case in the court (100 dollars). Good Heavens, efficient little Sillypore!

And I missed that due also. So I was sent a few warning letters but all those went to my old address – by then I have moved home. So, they issued another arrest warrant, spending so much of their money again. The wife got noticed of it this time. Let me tell you, any level of authority must be easier to deal with than my furious wife. So I followed the process. The Police shamed me giving the ‘accused’ treatment and the HDB’s fine snowballed to 600 dollars. I produced evidences that I was traveling on those summon days and my change of address and got the fine down to 131 dollars. And paid it through my nose.

Call me shameless and shoot me when I end up like this next time.

But will this make me strive to be an N type? I don’t think so. I am afraid I will end up spending too much time on too smaller things, generally become insignificant in the big scheme of life and boring. Not that I achieved a name in the history. But I believe the answer is not the end result but an attempt on a journey towards it. Sounds like a big ass excuse to a lame laziness? I don’t know. But I do need some order in life. I am grateful to my wife – pleasantly or unpleasantly, she tries to bring some order to my domestic life. I need someone who can bring the same on the other compartments of life too. But I can’t pay for that. Do you know someone?